| Next Date: TBA
January 28th, 2013, 7 pm to 8:30 pm DatePUBLIC WORKSHOP DATE TBA LocationTechnology Law Center Building TicketsPurchase Your Tickets: Ticket purchase link will be posted 1-2 weeks prior to event. Full Price Day of Event Early Bird Discount: Buy early and save 20%! (Insider’s secret: Jonathan will let you and a friend come together using the Couples Ticket even if you aren’t a couple. Gee, what a swell fella that Jonathan is!) Schedule this seminar for your event: 801.787.8014 or Events@MarriageEnvy.com Are you attending this workshop soon?Please fill out the Pre-Questionnaire which helps me craft a more tailored presentation to participant’s feedback. |
—Seminar Participant
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“There aren’t any good men/women out there.”
This is a frequent lament I hear, yet every day I work with amazing people who are preparing themselves well by working hard to be the best person they can be—thus I have to disagree. They are not only “out there” they are in my office every day figuring out how to attract the best and finding the great, stable and healthy ones who ARE out there. Now, of course, I know that the typical dating pool is more a stinky, boggy quagmire than a sparkling clean pool. The question isn’t “Are there any good guys/women out there?” The question is, “What do I need to know and do to attract the best?”
Just because you’re not in a relationship or “only” dating and not ready for marriage yet, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be getting ready now. As I tell my clients, the time for practice is not during the game—the time for practice is WAY before the game begins.
This seminar is designed for those who are single not in a relationship or dating and exploring relationships. Whether you’ve never been married or if you have been divorced and want to prevent having the same marriage again with a different person.
In this seminar you will learn:
- The Mechanics of Attraction: How to attract the best and repel the rest;
- Yes, the good ones ARE out there;
- About the “Secret Dating Pool” no one ever tells you about and how to find it;
- Self-work: The Truth vs. The Lie
- Bye-bye “Should”
- The Mechanics of Creation: “Great relationships don’t ‘just happen.’ They are created.”
- The 5 Cs of Relation Creation;
- The Trust Equation;
- The Intimacy Equation;
- Boundaries: High Standards DO Scare Off Potential Mates—The Scary Ones
- Healthy and unhealthy relationship dynamics: What to run towards and what to run screaming from;
- How to develop and stick to clear boundaries that attract the best and repel the worst;
- How to use the “Will/Won’t List”;
- How to identify and use the “Red Flags/Green Flags List”;
- Busting Common Relationship Myths: “If he really loved me…”
- Chemistry and Soulmate Mythologies;
- The Gender Gap: Men and women are naturally incompatible
- Getting Past the Gender Gap: How to Honor Gender Diversity as Actual Culture:
- Getting beyond lip-service of “I respect your opinion, but…”
- Learning Manglish and Womanese
- Key Dating Do’s and Don’ts
- Oxytocin: Why otherwise intelligent people act completely stupid in relationships and how to Be Relationship Smart.
- Healthy time lines for dating/courtship;
- Why pre-marital and early-marital counseling is a no-brainer must;
- Content subject to change depending on group dynamics, my personal whims ;-) and time constraints (ie., a 90 minute keynote or a full-day seminar)
Get your Ticket Here
Also, attend the full Relationship Mastery Series (read more here)
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Book Jonathan
Please fill out this Speaker Request Form to book Jonathan to offer this presentation to your group. Thank you.
Evaluation Results
I don’t filter my evaluation results I give them here as straight as I get them. I figure if you’re making the important decision to select the right speaker for your group is it better to just get filtered positive only testimonials about a potential speaker or to know how people respond to the speaker including both those who loved it and didn’t? So if someone thought I stunk you’ll hear it hear first. Obviously, I don’t try to make everyone happy. Part of my utility is to get people out of their comfort zones. If the majority love an approach I use in a seminar I’ll continue those items that resonate with most. If the majority hate an approach I’ll drop it. If one or two people don’t like what the majority love, then I don’t give much heed to those critiques, of course. However, I appreciate all feedback, which is one of the reasons my evaluation results are consistently high: My audiences teach me what they like and what works best for them and I listen.
My evaluation form contains the following items:
- 1-10 Rating: “Please rate your overall experience of this presentation”
| Horrid/Very Poor | Poor | Fair | Good | Very Good/Excellent | |||||
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |
- The Good: “What was brilliant, superb, exhilarating, life-altering, or opened the heavens for you? In short, what did you like about the presentation?
- One Thing: “What’s one thing that you plan on using and/or implementing into your life from this presentation?” This tells me out of everything what was the one thing that had the most meaningful impact.
- The Bad: “What stunk, turned your stomach, gave you a headache, made you dizzy, or gave you gas? In short, what didn’t you like that could be improved and/or what would you like to see covered that wasn’t? (Go ahead, I can take it!)”
- Requested eZine: This is actually also an evaluation measure: You’d think that someone who would give a lower rating didn’t like the presentation. However, while it may not have been the favorite for that person, they got enough out of it that they would like to receive emails containing articles, tips, strategies and events on these topics from me.
Event: Chainbreaker Foundation
Date: 5.7.13
Attendance: 50
Number of Evals Returned: 33
Average Rating for this Event: 9.6/10
| Rating | The Good | One Thing Different | The Bad | eZine? |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 10 | If I put this into practice it will be life-altering! | Boundaries | Nothing. Please come back often! | Y |
| 10 | – | – | Not enough time | Y |
| 10 | I love your personality. You teach in such a powerful, down-to-earth and relatable manner. I’ve been to a lot of workshops and I’ve NEVER heard the things you presented here tonight, nor in the way you present them. I wish I had gotten this 30 years ago! | – | – | Y |
| 10 | I like the skills–I was looking for answers and you gave them. To know that there are people of the opposite who struggle to do the work just as I do–that here are good ones out there. | Not believing The LIES and knowing my values. Staying congruent with self. | – | Y |
| 10 | I never knew WHY I self-sabotage. Now I get it! I don’t like being told I ‘should’ do something. Thank you! | Banish ‘should’ forever. | I’m sad that you won’t give me the address to ‘the secret dating pool.’ ;-) j/k | Y |
| 10 | Everything you said was excellent. | Making good boundaries. | – | – |
| 10 | Love the discussion on boundaries. | Practicing boundaries. | 0 | Y |
| 10 | – | Boundaries | – | Y |
| 10 | I appreciated learning your view on boundaries and that high standards scare away unhealthy people. EXCELLENT! | – | – | Y |
| 10 | Boundaries. | Setting boundaries and sticking to them. Learning my self-worth. | All good! | Y |
| 10 | The bad self-talk. Not being a hypocrite of myself and my standards. | Believing that I am awesome and can be a good, healthy person. | Nothing. | Y |
| 10 | Boundaries and self-worth. | Setting more strict boundaries. Thinking better of myself. | Nothing. It was all great! | Y |
| 10 | – | I must take responsibility to set my own boundaries and don’t have to please people. | – | – |
| 10 | Healthy people attract healthy people. | Work on getting healthier and having healthy boundaries. | – | Y |
| 10 | I loved the examples and the strong, honest presentation. Great feeling. | Considering and verbalizing boundaries more clearly. | – | Y |
| 10 | That high standards are the best way to be. | – | – | Y |
| 10 | Boundaries discussion. Chemistry and compatibility myth discussion and the 5 C’s of Relation Creation | Establish better boundaries for myself. | Need more time! | Y |
| 10 | The dynamic presentation. Clear, informative, eye-opening, down to earth! POSITIVE and ENCOURAGING! I am excited about the pre-marital workshops: AWESOME! | The Apex | – | Y |
| 10 | – | Lies I tell myself. Set boundaries. | – | Y |
| 10 | Everything. | Boundaries. | Nothing | Y |
| 10 | – | Continue working on self-improvement. | – | Y |
| 10 | All of it. The story of the woman who thought she needed chemistry. | – | Nothing bad. | Y |
| 10 | I enjoyed the whole workshop. Thank you. | Choosing, committing, creating. | Nothing | Y |
| 10 | Loved The TRUTH, the whole TRUTH and nothing but the TRUTH! | Remembering to be honest with myself. The AA program teaches in the Big Book that the only people who can’t get well are those that are somewhat incapable of being honest with themselves. | – | Y |
| 9 | Thank you so much! You are AWESOME! | The boundary musts. | – | Y |
| 9 | Correct principles always ring true and have impact. Correct principles when spoken/heard have power to affect an awakening/a paradigm shift. | The concept that marriage needs/deserves a blueprint before hand–like a building does. | No bad, really. | Y |
| 9 | Boundaries require backbone. | Firm boundaries even when people don’t like you. | – | Y |
| 9 | AWESOME! | – | –Y | |
| 9 | Examples and information. | Self-help. | – | Y |
| 8 | Realize you need to have boundaries and chemistry. | – | – | Y |
| 8 | Great thoughts on how to re-wire the brain and create a self that attracts others to be in your presence in a healthy way. | Boundaries | – | Y |
| 7 | – | – | – | Y |
Event: Transformation Station
Date: 8.5.11
Attendance: 65
Number of Evals Returned: 34
Average Rating for this Event: 9.3/10
| Rating | The Good |
One Thing |
The Bad |
Requested eZine? |
| 10 | “The Work and The Apex” really clarified to me something that I believed in but couldn’t quite explain. I love the confirmation about the proper place for chemistry in relationships and what causes it. I love the scientific approach you use as opposed to loose beliefs or “pop-psych” mumbo jumbo. | What I really believe about myself. It will be a fight, but I will need to be consistent in aligning actions with beliefs. | Nothing! | Y |
| 10 | Humor. Straight explanation. | explanation Boundaries!!! My value. | We need you to do more and longer seminars! It was too short. | Y |
| 1o | I have always had difficulties with boundaries and it was enlightening for me to see how important they are. | Consistent behavior. I’ll spend some time setting behavior I want to change. | Less time on questions and comments so you can cover the VERY excellent material.Comment by Jonathan: This is always a delicate balance in a group setting of providing those who want just info with those who want more discussion/interaction. | Y |
| 10 | The Trust and Intimacy Equations! Reaffirmed to me how trust is formed. I loved the “I AM DISNEYLAND!” concept. The “soulmate” myth and reality discussion of how healthy relationships aren’t “easy” but they are hard in that they require hard work. Also, loved the need to challenge the basic beliefs at the core of who you are. | Boundaries. I don’t know my own worth well, and I am not willing to stand up for it. | Nothing bad at all! I would like to learn how to implement ABUNDANCE mentality you discussed (and make it stick) in my world. | – |
| 10 | – | – | – | Y |
| 10 | The WHOLE thing! | – | Nothing. | Y |
| 10 | I loved the science and the factual nature of it. | Many things. | – | Y |
| 10 | Everything. All the information was really helpful. | Boundaries. | Not enough time! | Y |
| 10 | Very real, down to earth, useable information. | The Trust Equation. | – | – |
| 10 | The 5 Cs of Relation Creation. BRILLIANT! Always wondered WHAT was the foundation. | Four Season Courtship. Be direct/simple in communication with men. | Nothing, except not enough time! | Y |
| 10 | This really backed up my thinking and gave me more confidence in my own thinking. Loved the boundary section. Wonderful! | Boundaries | Shorten the intro and get to the meat sooner. :-) | Y |
| 10 | Boundaries and “The happiest place on earth” concept. Set your price and don’t lower it. You decide who gets in. | The 5 Cs of Relation Creation. Green Flags/Red Flags | Y | |
| 10 | I was really inspired and felt my mind open about boundaries. I guess the simplicity of the conversation helped me to identify some changes I need to make. | I made a long list of things to do! I’m going to put some time into defining myself… and understanding myself… and establishing boundaries and expectations that I can adhere to and respect. | Nothing bad, but a comment: I’m intrigued by the research you referred to. Could you make it available online… or if it is, could you draw attention to it?Comment by Jonathan: Hard to answer this specifically without citing thousands of references that have been incorporated over 17 years of practice and 6 years of education! ;-). As you can imagine, this presentation is the synthesis of a great body of research from many fields over many years. However, the short list is check out any of John M. Gottman, Ph.D.’s stuff on marriage and relationships, such as The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. | Y |
| 10 | I learned a lot from each of the areas covered. You did a great job. | Boundaries. The concept that “I AM worth it.” | Wished we had started on time, simply because wanted more time to learn even more. | Y |
| 10 | Everything was SO awesome!!! | Trust and Intimacy Equations. | Y | |
| 10 | -Realzing to recognize my worth, so don’t settle for less-than-good treatment.-That you can make a relationship work with someone who you don’t have huge chemistry with.-Consider people you may have overlooked.-Kick to the curb the ones who don’t treat you right!!! | All of the above | – | Y |
| 10 | To learn that while it’s nice you don’t NEED chemistry. | Don’t be so hard on myself. | – | Y |
| 10 | The price, the science, the humor. | Choice. | Please send me a copy of the slides. | Y |
| 9 | Understanding and honoring the unique gender cultures of men and women. | That I have a good understanding of how to be in a relationship. I enjoyed this very much! | None. | Y |
| 9 | So fun and informative! | Boundaries. | – | Y |
| 9 | Great sense of humor. Well developed information. | The Trust Equation | Nothing | – |
| 9 | I really liked the info about boundaries and gender culture. | Four Season Courtship | – | – |
| 9 | Chemistry is nice but not necessary. | Boundaries. | – | Y |
| 9 | – | – | – | Y |
| 9 | Helped me to see areas I need to work on. | The Truth vs. The Lie. Set my standards high no matter what. | Less discussion with audience, move through slides faster. | Y |
| 9 | Your humor. | Go over your suggestions and read over the handout info. | – | Y |
| 9 | You! I miss our sessions, your energy and information! | Implementing Consistent Behavior. | I didn’t get to stay beyond 8:30, sad I missed the rest of the info. | Y |
| 9 | Your energy and ability to cut to the chase. | The Trust and Intimacy Equations. | Nothing. I really felt like it was all fantastic! | Y |
| 8 | Lots of good advice. You can’t love someone until you love yourself, etc… That much of a being healthy is mindset and outlook on life. | Whether a diamone is perched atop a ring on a finger or under a pile of horse poo, it doesn’t change it’s inherent worth. | A little too cocky ;-)Comment by Jonathan: That’s in reference to what I said a few times: “I’m not cocky, I’m confident. The evidenced-based research that predicts outcomes let’s me be very confident.” | – |
| 8 | Valid points. Made me think. | Changing my mindset with The Truth vs. The Lie. | Y | |
| 8 | Very engaging. The speaker is great with the crowd. | Boundaries | Just not enough time. | Y |
| 7 | Good information. | – | Taking too many comments from audience. Not getting through the material.Comment by Jonathan: Again, the balance between different learning styles. I made the disclaimer at the beginning of the workshop that this was an interactive, discussion-based presentation and that “getting through the slides” was secondary to real-life discussion. Plus, material content actually always gets covered and integrated in the course of the discussion I’ve found. | Y |
| 7 | Casual, easy, humorous presentation. | – | – | Y |
| 7 | Reminders on boundaries was good. | Setting/resetting boundaries. | I just need lists and reminders at this point—no stories or entertainment. | Y |
Facebook Q&A Discussions
Facebook Friend: I’m starting to wonder where all the good guys are :( They can’t all be married, right? There has to be one out there for me right? I’m starting to wonder…
Jonathan: They ARE out there! That’s exactly what my “Attract the Best” clients come to find out. Woo hoo! Good luck and hold out for the best you deserve! :-)
Facebook Friend: Thanks!!! I needed to hear that :) any good advise on how to find him?
Jonathan: You’re welcome. Yeah, no one believes me exactly when we first begin the “Attract the Best ” work because the dating pool is more like a dating bog… but I teach people how to find what I call “the secret dating pool.” Yeah, tons of advice, but too hard to explain in a few sentences—I wish there was a way to condense it that easily. I present the approach/advise in my “Attract the Best” Singles Seminar as the first of eight in my Relationship Mastery Seminar Series so you can attend that when it comes around next… or the next time I’m invited to speak at a singles group. If you’re really interested contact me directly and we can discuss. You can see the outline [above ] for the workshop of some of the key concepts we cover. Either way, hold onto hope and don’t give into the rampant negativity and despair that surrounds much of the dating scene!
